Story - A Drunk Man at the Bar

A Drunk Man at the Bar:

A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned something about his girlfriend being out in the car. The bartender, concerned because it was so cold, went to check on her. When he looked inside the car, he saw the man's friend, Dave, and his girlfriend kissing one another. The bartender shook his head and walked back inside.
He told the drunk that he thought it might be a good idea to check on his girlfriend. The fellow staggered outside to the car, saw his buddy and his girlfriend kissing, then walked back into the bar laughing.
"What's so funny? " the bartender asked.
"That stupid Dave! " the fellow chortled, "He's so drunk, he thinks he's me! "

Story - Fascinate

Fascinate:

A teacher asked her students to use the word "fascinate " in a sentence. Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating. " The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word "'fascinate.'" Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated. " The teacher said, "Good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate.'" Little Billy raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Billy was noted for is bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate " so she called on him. Billy said, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten 8. "

Quotes - Louis de Bernières

Louis de Bernières:

Women only nag when they feel unappreciated.

Proverb - Rome wasn't built in a day

Rome wasn't built in a day:

All things take time to create. And great things like the city of Rome take a very long time. So we shouldn't expect to accomplish something or achieve success immediately.

Idiom - From now on

From now on:

If you do something "from now on", you do it from now until some unknown time in the future.

From now on you can wear casual clothes to work every Friday.

I was lucky to escape from the accident with just a few minor injuries, so from now on I'm going to be much more careful when I drive.

Persian:   از این به بعد

Quotes - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Ralph Waldo Emerson:

Life is a progress, and not a station.

Quotes - Fyodor Dostoevsky

Fyodor Dostoevsky:

My God, a moment of bliss. Why, isn't that enough for a whole lifetime?

Quotes - Chuck Palahniuk

Chuck Palahniuk:

It can only take a moment to waste the rest of your life.

Quotes - Anne Carson

Anne Carson:

Words bounce. Words, if you let them, will do what they want to do and what they have to do.

Quotes - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart:

Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius.

English Jokes

Jokes 02:

How do you starve a black man?
hide his food stamps under his work boots

English Jokes

Joke 01:

Why did the cop stay in bed?
He wanted to be an undercover cop

Quotes - Lisa M. Klein

Lisa M. Klein:

What is a man's life but a prelude to his death? And what is death but a long sleep, a most welcome forgetfulness.

Quotes - William Cowper

William Cowper:

Variety's the very spice of life, that gives it all it's flavor.

Quotes - Anna Pavlova

Anna Pavlova:

"When a small child, I thought that success spelled happiness. I was wrong, happiness is like a butterfly which appears and delights us for one brief moment, but soon flits away.

Proverb - A good husband makes a good wife

A good husband makes a good wife:

If a woman is happy with her husband, she will be a good mate for him.

Idiom - Knock your socks off

Knock your socks off:

If something knocks your socks off, it amazes you and surprises you.

When Nora did her presentation on the new development, she knocked our socks off. It was very impressive.

Michael knocked everyone's socks off when he performed at the music awards. It was the best performance of the night, by far.

Persian:  به وجد اوردن

Story - Honk if You're in a Hurry

Honk if You're in a Hurry:

Mark was cursing the driver in front of him because she was creeping along. He was running late for a golf game with his friend Barney. He was on a two-lane road that led to the golf course. The road was straight uphill. It went for six blocks through a busy residential neighborhood. There was a four-way stop sign at the end of each block.

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Quotes - Paul Valéry

Paul Valéry:

Poems are never finished - just abandoned.

Quotes - Gustave Flaubert

Gustave Flaubert:

What an awful thing life is, isn't it? It's like soup with lots of hairs floating on the surface. You have to eat it nevertheless.

Quotes - Albert Einstein

Albert Einstein:

The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.

Idiom - A head start

A head start:

If you have a head start, you start something ahead of others or with an advantage over others.

If you're born into a rich family, and you've had a good education, you're lucky enough to have had a head start in life, so don't waste it.

Marylin's beauty and natural grace gave her a big head start in the modelling and acting business.

Quotes - Rupert Brooke

Rupert Brooke:

A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years.

Vocabulary - Unibrow

Unibrow:

Eyebrows which are connected to each other forming one eyebrow.

Persian: ابرو پیوندی

Quotes - Charles Dickens

Charles Dickens:

There is a wisdom of the head, and there is a wisdom of the heart.